Getting Started - Unconditional Love_001Aug 16, 2022
I am struggling to get a writing habit started. I notice that every time I hear of someone writing a book or starting a blog or something similar, I get convicted. I know I need to be writing, and yet, I find it so hard to start. This morning I told myself I would write without an agenda. This makes it easier to sit down and write.
What do I want to give to myself / my potential audience with my writing? My passion is to learn all I can about unconditional love because experiencing it back in July 2011 changed my life in profound ways. In extension, I have a passion to share what I learn about unconditional love with others. What can I really do with a passion like that? I think it will give me joy to write about my journey. Yet, how can I use my passion to support myself and my family financially? I am not making anything, or bringing anyone "results". I can not create unconditional love and package it in a bottle and sell it. lol... I am in limbo as to what value, besides intrinsic value, I have to offer by writing and sharing what I write with others.
When I sit down to write, I keep finding myself trying to be like other people I have seen here and there over the years. Never once am I thinking I can just sit down at the computer and start typing as myself. Just me. ... exactly as I am. Maybe intrinsic value is enough to get started.
I am struggling with too many agendas attached to my writing. I want to make a fair living with the things I choose to spend my time on. And yet, I want to write with all my heart about things I am passionate about. I can not see a real way to may a living by writing about unconditional love. I want to help and support others with the things I choose to spend my time on. How can my exploring unconditional love help others...? I don't know what I have to offer anyone that may read what I write. I don't have answers for people. I don't have a magic bullet for people. I can't fix others or take away their pain, grief, or fear... Without having any answers, I wonder how I will be relevant to others in a helpful way; what can I really offer anyone?
As I sit here wondering "why should I even start?"...I get reminded of why I actually want to write, intrinsic value... expressing my passion... I notice, that even with no agenda, the ideas and thoughts flow, even more so. Maybe letting go of the preconceived agendas is what I need to help me get started. When digging deep, I realize that writing helps me. I want to help people. I am a person!
Sure, I would love to help and support others and it would be one of the greatest honors I could imagine to be able to support someone's journey to finding peace and love in their heart. And, even more so if they then share that peace and love with their own family and friends. I could not imagine a greater honor than to be a part of that journey with someone. Again, Ginger.... "you are a person... you are someone!" "You are part of the journey with someone. You are part of the journey with yourself." Reminding myself of this with self-compassion helps me feel motivated to write. Yes, I talk to myself often.
Realizing all this does not change some of the other thoughts that carry weight in my heart. Another valid reason why I wonder what I can offer is I have no real power to generate unconditional love, even for myself. I have no control over someone learning how to love unconditionally or how to share unconditional love with others. What I did notice is I can align with unconditional love. I may not have the power to create it, but I can align with it and I understand how I am learning to align with it. Aligning with unconditional love is how I want to spend my time and what I hope to write about. I want to share my journey so far. Next time I sit down to write, I want to start from the beginning with my first experience of unconditional love back in July 2011. Talk to you again soon.