Self-Sabotage For Dummies... That Should Be a Book!

reflections May 27, 2020

Today I am motivated to lose weight and get in shape!  I have struggled for many years with following through with things that I start. Sometimes, I feel cursed.

I can see that my beliefs are keeping me stuck. And yet, I still feel anxiety when I reach a point of real change.  Despite what my head knows and my heart claims to want, I fight against change with one excuse after another.  When change gets too real, I can feel like I'm losing autonomy and control in my life.  Then, I subconsciously sabotage my efforts... cause at least I can control how and what I sabotage, right?  It starts subtly at first... then, change just fades into the background and I put a checkmark next to "another failed attempt"...

After I sabotage, I feel a brief flash of relief that things have remained the same.  I don't have to face myself and I don't have to face the unknown.  I also feel defeated and occasionally even hopeless that things are not changing in my life. 

Then, I go back to my hiding spot in my head and defend my subconscious dysfunction, helping it remain afraid and encouraging it to hold tight to a life that holds me back.  I do this over and over and over... I feel stuck. I really do want out.  Have you ever felt like this?  I have many times.

Everyone wants to believe they have the answer for me... if I do this or that they can help me break free from these chains.  Have you ever felt dread and even exhaustion when you consider trying the "next-new-program"?  Maybe it will work... this time.

Truth is, a program cannot help me break free from my own self-sabotage. No one can break you free from your own self-sabotage.

People generally cannot put forth the amount of effort needed to hold someone's hand through self-destruction.

How do you know if you are subconsciously sabotaging your efforts? 

This is easy to answer. Have you ever started a venture to change your life for the better, only to find yourself right back where you started (or worse) weeks or months later? If you have EVER done this, then you have sabotaged yourself…

So, what does help?

I know what helped me. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. I am learning how to love myself unconditionally and it is beginning to heal my self-sabotage dysfunction. Love is healing.

Buying another program or joining another gym to change your habits and your life will likely not last until you learn how to let go of your self-sabotaging efforts, first.  If you try again to "get in shape and create new healthy lifestyle habits" before you have learned how to let go of self-sabotage, you are throwing your money to the wind. Again.

Unconditional Love is how you let go of self-sabotage.  You can learn this from God.  The Christian bible is a great source if you want to learn from God.  God, and God's love expressed through people (in the most unexpected places), are where I learned how to love myself and others.

I am growing in my ability to love unconditionally every day.  Learning how to truly love unconditionally (even the flawed way I do it) changed my heart and awakened my spirit.  I chose to make unconditional love of oneself and others the fundamental core of my business and my life.  I want to make a living by learning and teaching love.  I desire to share what I learned and co-create with you a Tribe community with a mission to love.

Join me if your heart is saying, "YES, I want that too"!

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MindfulBasics Blog

This blog is a conglomerate of health & wellness content, personal struggles, wins, failures, insights, inspirations, and many facets of real-life journeys.

When you subscribe you will get the blog posts sent to your email in chronological and series order so it is easy to follow.

Occasionally, you will also get exclusive offers and content directly in your email... yes, offers really are exclusive to this email series ;-)

If you are new to us, please check your email to confirm consent for MindfulBasics.com to email you.